Scrolling Headlines:

UMass football fall camp: Jackson Porter adapting well following switch to wide receiver -

Tuesday, September 1, 2015

UMass football fall camp: Minutemen look for Robert Kitching to anchor defensive line -

Monday, August 31, 2015

Closing arguments delivered in Adam Liccardi rape trial -

Monday, August 31, 2015

Early goals sink UMass men’s soccer in loss to Saint Peter’s -

Monday, August 31, 2015

UMass field hockey splits weekend matches with UNH and BU -

Sunday, August 30, 2015

UMass women’s soccer struck by injuries, struggles offensively as it falls to No. 24 Rutgers -

Sunday, August 30, 2015

UMass men’s soccer drops season opener to Utah Valley in overtime -

Friday, August 28, 2015

UMass football notebook: Jackson Porter moves to WR, UMass schedules 2016 game with South Carolina -

Friday, August 28, 2015

Former UMass student who accused four men of rape in 2012 testifies during trial Friday -

Friday, August 28, 2015

REPORT: UMass football’s Da’Sean Downey faces two assault charges in connection with February fight -

Thursday, August 27, 2015

UMass football Media Day: Catching up with Joe Colton -

Thursday, August 27, 2015

UMass football fall camp: Creating turnovers, forcing mistakes the focus for linebacking corps -

Wednesday, August 26, 2015

Jurors hear police interview, read text messages by defendants in third UMass rape trial -

Wednesday, August 26, 2015

‘Living at UMass’ app aims to make move-in weekend a breeze -

Tuesday, August 25, 2015

UMass rape trial halts abruptly, opening statements delivered Tuesday -

Tuesday, August 25, 2015

UMass football fall camp: Jamal Wilson returns from injury with confidence he is ‘main guy’ at running back -

Tuesday, August 25, 2015

UMass football fall camp: Freshmen Sekai Lindsay, Andy Isabella impressing at running back -

Monday, August 24, 2015

UMass ranked in top 25 for LGBTQ students -

Monday, August 24, 2015

UMass football fall camp day five: Rodney Mills looks to continue bringing versatility to tight end position -

Friday, August 21, 2015

Route 9 Diner to reopen under new ownership -

Friday, August 21, 2015

There are no more barriers to cross

Well, where to begin?

My role at the Massachusetts Daily Collegian is at its end. My college career is at its end. Some of the great relationships I’ve developed at this University are sadly at their end. What have I left to show for it?

I’m still trying to put that into words.

I arrived to the University of Massachusetts when I was 17. I was always the youngest person in my grade through all levels of schooling. It may seem miniscule, but it was different being among peers who had experienced life a full year more than I had. I often felt that I was missing something, not looking at things the same way because of my age.

It didn’t help that I was constantly alone. I was alone at home, being raised by a hard-working single father because my mother died from breast cancer when I was eight years old. I didn’t have any siblings to share my experiences with. I didn’t have a pet to comfort me.

As much as my situation seemed like a disadvantage to me at the time, I look back and wonder how I would have turned out had it not been for the cards that were dealt to me. My loneliness matured me.

Being alone, however, also made me a guarded person, which was challenged immediately when I came to UMass. I had to open up to people and share myself in ways I had never done before.

The Collegian was an outlet that served that purpose. It allowed me to write, think and interact with people with similar and dissimilar interests. Yet I did those actions in the quietest manner possible. When I worked, I would put on my headphones and not say a word to anyone if I didn’t have to. I did the work I had and left.

My sophomore year, I was appointed an assistant sports editor and for the next four semesters, I’ve never worked harder in my life. I covered game after game, wrote story after story, did interview after interview and gave everything I had to the Collegian.

After becoming the sports editor, ironically, I did hardly any work. That was due in large part to three budding assistants who earned the opportunity to take over the section. Still, I was essentially a figurehead. That is hard for me to admit because I am a prideful person. But that was the reality. Of course I still managed and oversaw the section, but I took an incredible step back in actually contributing anything concrete to the paper. Yet I was compensated for my position. So was that my reward? Did I live and breathe the Collegian for three years for the chance to do nothing in the end?

No. I learned from the people around me in my senior year as much as I learned skills at the Collegian in my first three. I took the time, because I just had more of it, to get to know more about my peers at the paper, as well as my roommates and the many friends I’ve made.

I would often lie awake in bed at night wondering how I will make it in this world. I would feel scared, feeling that I wouldn’t make a living as a journalist. I didn’t know if my life would end up being the one I hoped for. If my experiences at college have done anything for me, it’s quelling those fears.

I now know that hard work can trump anything. I know how invaluable great friends are. I know that I will be just fine.

Honestly, I don’t know what purpose these senior columns serve. I’m not attempting to be funny, intelligent, insightful or nostalgic. I’m not trying to make you feel anything. I don’t know what I hope to accomplish by writing this. For that reason, I didn’t look at any past columns for an idea of what to write because there is no blueprint to this, just like there is no blueprint to life.

But I do hope after reading this that you know both more about me and less at the very same time.

As Patrick Bateman accepted, “even after admitting this, there is no catharsis … and I gain no deeper knowledge of myself. No new knowledge can be extracted from my telling. This confession has meant nothing.”

Jay Asser was an entity, something illusory at the Collegian. He can be reached at jay_asser@yahoo.com.

 

Comments
One Response to “There are no more barriers to cross”
  1. Diego Fellows says:

    Jay, I loved reading your articles in the Collegian, very thoughtful, very detailed. You make Salem proud and I know whatever you do next, success will follow. Congrats on another graduation! Well done sir, and I owe you a tennis match soon.

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