You are only allowed to go outside during clear daylight hours; dusk and dawn do not constitute daylight hours. During the winter these hours (in New England approximately eight a day, from 8:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m.) are especially limited. However, you are expected to obey the aforementioned rule.
It is suggested that you not walk alone in areas of low pedestrian traffic, such as alleys, side streets, parking lots, your back yard or driveway.
Furthermore, it is not advised that you ever live alone. This is especially true in densely populated areas, like cities, and economically disadvantaged areas. Supposing that you choose to live alone, doing so risks your own safety at a much higher rate than your peers who live with partners, or roommates. To decrease this risk, it is advised you keep an imposing (and thus protective) canine pet.
Clothing should be carefully chosen to not elicit any undesirable attention, or worse, especially when out after sundown. Also remember, regardless of clothing choice, after the sun has set you must be accompanied by an appropriate chaperone.
Regardless of the hour of day, if your car breaks down, do not allow anyone who helpfully pulls over to assist you, unless they are a uniformed police officer. That said, question even the police officer; they to might have ulterior motives or expect unlawful compensation for their aid.
Do not go to the bathroom alone; this is an area of high risk for your kind. Take comrades to the toilet with you.
Do not travel alone; you will be taken advantage of.
If you do not follow the aforementioned recommendations you run the risk of incurring violence upon your person. If violent actions are taken against you, because you have not stuck to the above guidelines, responsibility for said violence will fall partly on your shoulders.
Consider yourself oppressed by the fear of violence: welcome to womanhood.
As young adolescents, daughters are often more restricted by parents than their sons of equal ages. The female gender is raised to believe it is at risk, more vulnerable to assault, and less able to protect itself.
As a female freshman, you hear of a friend, or even a nameless peer, who was assaulted in the bathroom four doors down from your bedroom – the same bathroom you use when the pressure of a full bladder wakes you at 3 a.m. – and that instance of fear sticks with you. The bathroom is added to your running mental list of places that are not safe for women to be at certain times of the night or day.
One evening this summer, five female friends went out to a bar. Dressed for a girl’s night out (meaning there was less focus on revealing skin) the five returned home around 1 a.m. On the 20-minute walk home, through what is considered a safe, small city, the five women encountered constant catcalls from men on the sidewalk and from across the road as they walked. One group of young fellows followed the five women for about a quarter of a mile repeatedly asking why the five females didn’t want to stop and “talk.” Eventually, the men found a group of women on their side of the street who were stopped and took interest in them, leaving our heroines to endure only catcalls from static figures on the remainder of their walk home.
Women are raised to feel fear when alone in a questionable situation; all five were surprised to feel fear as a rather solid pack traveling together for the very reason of protection.
The men who followed these five women may have actually only wanted to talk; they might be well-rounded, charming fellows with a few too many beers in them. Men who most nights tuck baby sisters into bed with a hug and a lullaby. That night, however, they scared five women.
Violence against women is an issue of both safety and fear. Women are imprisoned by the learned fear of male violence against women. Whether or not the fear is imbedded in reality, it is a mindset we have absorbed from both the women and men who want to protect us. Statistically, the terror is valid, and socially too often disrespected by men.
Men who do not threaten the safety of women, and in their own relationships are both protective and respectful, often feel no responsibility for male violence. They also, often pooh-pooh their female friends safety fears. These doting boyfriends, brothers, fathers, friends, etc. have taken a personal stand. However, a personal stand is not enough. All men and women are responsible for violence against women. Standing by and watching your friend talk to the girl who is too drunk to make coherent decisions is allowing violence against women to potentially happen.
I do not know any men that I believe would violate a woman’s safety. But I do know men who could have stopped a situation and did not. It is your business, because violence against women affects men directly: it changes how women live and how they relate to men. In order to nullify the female fear of male violence, all men must take an active stand to protect women.
S.J. Port is a Collegian columnist.
