Whether people flocked to see “10,000 BC” merely because of the lack of good movies out there, the uncanny similarities of its advertising campaign with “300,” or because of its alluring and expensive-looking special effects, is something that remains to be seen. It should be said, however, that “10,000 BC” isn’t worth two hours of your time, never mind your hard-earned six bucks.
In the politically correct world we live today, the term “BC” may cause some to lift their eyebrows. That is about as far that the film takes religious terminology. The film’s title is basically a statement as to when the film starts, which is at or around 12,000 years ago, or at the beginning of the Mesolithic period. Before any of the actors speak, we settle in with a narration that is downright annoying. What’s worse is that it doesn’t go away. Instead the cheesy narrator continues his lecture about the ancient tribesmen’s journeys, nature, the sun, etc. until you basically want to get up and leave the room until he stops.
Once the narrator disappears for a while, we’re introduced to the film’s protagonists, D’Leh (Steven Strait) and Evolet (Carmilla Belle). In the introductory scenes, D’Leh and Evolet are children and looked at as outsiders by the rest of the kids in the tribe. D’Leh’s father, who abandoned the tribe when he left to find food, is quickly labeled as a coward, ultimately leaving a stigma for D’Leh. Meanwhile, Evolet is seen as the young girl with the bright blue eyes who prompted a prophecy from Old Mother, the wise old woman of the tribe. The two young children make an instant connection, which goes on until they reach adulthood.
Years later, when D’Leh and Evolet are young adults and in love, their tribe is ransacked by an enemy tribe, and among the many people kidnapped is Evolet. The enemy is far more advanced, equipped with horses, metal weapons and even ships.
The predictable plot continues onward, with D’Leh going out to save his true love. By taking just two members of his tribe with him to take on an entire army, D’Leh has a difficult task ahead of him. Traveling through mountains, jungles, and deserts (all of which are in walking distance from each other), D’Leh and his fellow tribesmen take on giant bird beasts and straggling members of the enemy tribe.
When the historical inaccuracies couldn’t become more farfetched, we encounter the enemy tribe dragging its prisoners through a desert to enslave them to build pyramids. The fact that the film chose pyramids, as in the Egyptian Pyramids, is either a huge mistake on their behalf, or an insult to the audience to think that they don’t know any better.
Ultimately, as D’Leh and his tribesmen journey through the desert, they encounter tribe upon tribe to help them in defeating a common enemy. Coincidentally, these new tribes had members kidnapped to build the ancient pyramids as well. In the end, the good triumphs over evil and D’Leh and Evolet reunite after an epic battle.
“10,000 BC” is very much like a video game. For a while, the graphics keep you entertained, but after a while you just get sick of it and end up leaving the room. Like “Beowulf,” the special effects are amazing, but the film itself is lacking. The acting is stiff and the historical and geographical inaccuracies are inexcusable. If “Apocalypto” can be a film using ancient dialects with a great storyline, why couldn’t “10,000 BC?”
Frank Godinho can be reached at [email protected]
