Guys most often have trouble with the “Friend Zone” because once they get there, it’s next to impossible to get out.
If a guy finds himself in the “Friend Zone” with a girl and is looking to take the relationship to the next level it isn’t uncommon to feel as though the challenge is far too daunting. If you’ve worked for that special moment only to see it crumble before your eyes, remember that there is still hope.
You need to accept the risk of losing her as a friend if you want to have any shot. If you go in expecting a friendship and maybe more, you might want to hit the brakes for a second. Slow down and establish your goal. In order to stay out of the “Friend Zone,” look for these red flags.
You Know You’re in the “Friend Zone” if…
Every girl needs to be comforted, and as a man trying to work yourself into her life, you must approach the technique delicately. Some guys have the tendency to take it too far – consoling them about every little thing and as a result, suppress any chance they may have had to be more. Draw the line as her shoulder to cry on; never ever listen to her problems about her boyfriend or love interest. That should be the last thing you want to hear on the other end of the phone. Catch her tears, but do not be the guy she can run to about every other man in her life.
If you ever watch a movie with a girl, make sure it’s you, her and no more than two other people. Any more than four and the “Friend Zone” will be calling your name.
If the girl you’re with is ever at the point of using “guy language” with you, you hit the “Friend Zone.” Her calling you “dude” or “man” is a tell-tale sign. Look out for those cheap expressions such as, “What are ya doing?” or “What are ya up to dude?” Similar utterances should be treated like a yellow light – warning you to stop before you cross the line.
If she starts talking about other guys in front of you, that is a sign of the “Friend Zone.” Phrases like “Wow, he’s cute!” are strong indicators of your friend designation. Avoid all the girl talk and let her run to her girl friends because if she feels like she can take you shopping and drag around with her, you’ve hit the “Friend Zone.”
If she uses you as an introduction to meet other guys, for instance, “Hey I’m Carolyn. Meet my friend Richie!” or she tries to set you up with her friends, she is not interested.
Lastly, if she calls you over to help her move the couch and you get nothing more than a pat on the back, you know you’re in the “Friend Zone.”
Rebounding From The “Friend Zone”
If you get stuck in the “Friend Zone,” it is a good idea to save your sanity and move on. Cope with your loss and put yourself back on the market, new possibilities are endless. Once you have seen, “She’s Just Not That Into You,” it may be easier to accept the notion of friendship. Once you have done that, just relax, chill and have with your buddies. Order some wings, have a few beers and just have a good time.
A fun night laughing with your friends will help you get your mind off the girl. Train yourself to avoid communication with her. Anticipating any dialogue with her will make you edgy and unapproachable.
As Ryan Reynolds in “Just Friends” learned the hard way, be sure to avoid lunch dates with any girl because they’re just bad news. “Lunch dates, that’s the ‘friend zone,’” said UMass junior Joe Kosar, “If you’re eating lunch and she walks in, just book it!”
Tyler Manoukian can be reached at [email protected],