Thought we were gone? Guess again. The lovely ladies of “Running with Scissors” are back again this week after damn Christopher Columbus put our column on hold last week. This week we tackle the next most important aspect after cologne, and that is dress. We will again offer our opinions on what we like and what we think looks good.
There is something to be said for the importance of dressing well. Yes, we understand, we are all college students and waking up in the morning and trying to look like a supermodel is not for everyone. However, it is important to go to class in clean clothes. That means socks too. You never know who you could bump into while wandering across campus with dirty smelly clothes looking as though you just rolled out of bed.
The first article of clothing that will be tackled today are khaki pants. They are multi-purpose, and often omit the vibe that you’re dressed up, but you didn’t try too hard. Khaki cargos, like those available at Old Navy or if you have a few more bucks, Banana Republic, can make any outfit look a little nicer. If you’re using khakis for a dress up occasion, be sure to wear ones with pleats, not cargos, and for the love of everything holy, IRON, IRON, IRON. Khakis look nice, but not if they look like they’ve been lying on the floor since last Christmas. Be careful when eating too, it really sucks if you drop a meatball on your lap when you’re wearing light colored pants.
We are not forgetting about jeans. Jeans are wonderful in their own way, they have that casual feel to them that can give off a polished feel to them if they the right fit. There are a couple of types of jeans to avoid; these include the kind that are ripped to oblivion to the point in which it looks like you got into a fight with a rabid dog before you arrived on campus and dirty, stained pairs of jeans. Otherwise anything that isn’t too short or too baggy should do nicely.
Now the best way to top off a pair of freshly ironed khakis or jeans is a nice sweater. Since winter is approaching the chilly fall air makes sweaters both stylish and practical. There is a trick to sweaters however. You are wasting your time if you decide to wear something that resembles your grandmother’s couch. While the cabled hand-knitted sweater look was really popular in second grade it went out of style when we reached puberty. A good style to try is a fitted sweater. It maintains an air of casual yet sexy, and it shows off a toned upper body like nothing else. It also makes a semi-toned body look a great deal better than it really is. If you really don’t have the body to wear a fitted sweater I would go with baggy, sometimes that is simply better than looking like you need to wear a bro.
Sweaters are pretty much a no-brainer when it comes to colors and tones. Royal or navy blues are popular during the winter months as well as colors in the gray and black family. Avoid colors such as lime green and pink as well as white; no one wants to see you looking like the bride in a wedding party.
Another solid top selection to wear with khakis or jeans would be the button down shirt. Button down shirts are multi-purpose as well, they can dress up an outfit if they’re tucked in, or they can be used for casual purposes if they are left untucked. Plaids are nicest, but solids are nice as well. Again, IRON. Or at least buy some of the spray and hang stuff that takes wrinkles out for you. The shower method also works fairly well for the lazy, run the shower and hang up your shirt outside of it. As long as you don’t hang it close enough to fall into the shower it should be wrinkle free in no time due to the steam. Done wrong you could have soaking clothing, so follow this advice at your own risk.
Cotton button-downs can be tricky to keep in wearable shape, but avoid leaving them in the dryer for extended periods of time, and hang them up as soon as they are done with the wash. When we speak of button down shirts, we do not mean flannel. Flannel is grandpa or pajamas, and the worst flannels make men look like college educated winos.
Button down shirts can also work as a classy addition to the sweater. Simply wear your button down shirt underneath the sweater for a “I just graduated from Harvard look.” Honestly, it really isn’t best for casual day-to-day classroom wear however if you are say going on a dinner date or to meet someone else’s parents you can show that you are willing to go the extra mile by pairing up the button down and sweater with the pair of khaki’s.
To top off a classy, but an “I didn’t try too hard outfit,” try a nice leather belt, but make sure it matches your shoes. There’s nothing worse than a black belt with brown shoes or vice versa. Sneakers are wonderful too as long as they are kept relatively clean, but try to invest in some multi-purpose dress-ish shoes, just because they add class to any ensemble.
Slowly but surely, the women of “Running with Scissors” are trying to give men a clue about what women are really looking for. Sure, you can call us shallow. But we’re also right.
Melissa Hammel and Lizzy Nielsen are Collegian Columnists.
