It’s a day for family and feasting and for giving thanks for all of our blessings. A holiday centuries old, celebrated all across the country by all who are patriotic, except for many Native Americans who are ticked off at the whole genocide and stealing their land thing.

My friends and peers were kicked off the UMass campus and sent home to take part in a tradition. All came back with big grins on our faces, after undertaking in this joyous feast. But last Thursday, as my family was butchering Thanksgiving, I realized how unpatriotic they are.

My family isn’t the most observant when it comes to holidays, and although my family tries to celebrate them, they don’t follow the age-old traditions of our culture. Rather than celebrate the holiday on Thursday, as tradition mandates, they celebrate on a Friday. Worst yet, they celebrate on Friday night, an insult to the very essence of the holiday.

For ages, this day was celebrated on a Thursday afternoon, yet suddenly, my family thinks they can move Thanksgiving celebration to another day. I’m not sure why, but it was probably celebrated on a Thursday for a reason, probably a good one, and who are we to change the day? What right do we have? It’s just not the same when it’s on a Friday – and at night.

The biggest abomination was the serving of the turkey. Having watched hours upon hours of sitcoms the week before Thanksgiving, it became evidently clear that the turkey must be served and cut on the table when all of the guests are present. On every show – from “The Simpsons” to “Everybody Loves Raymond” – the turkey was cut right on the table. You can imagine my disgust and look of horror on my face when I found the turkey had been precut several hours before the meal was served. Carving the turkey on the table is a fundamental aspect of the Thanksgiving feast, and is not one of the traditions that can be bent or stretched. They might as well have served chicken wings.

Sure we had all the other necessary foods of the holiday, from cornbread and cranberry sauce to pumpkin pie, along with official Thanksgiving paper plates and matching napkins, but without the head of the table showing their turkey-cutting skills, it is simply not Thanksgiving.

There’s only one more thing this holiday requires, as I’ve learned from television: Everyone around the table should say what he or she is thankful for. All year I go around not being thankful for anything that I get, frequently taking wonderful things for granted. So naturally, as everyone started devouring the food that was in front of them, I sat a little confused and bewildered. I had spent weeks preparing my list of things I was thankful for, ready for going around the table when each would state our thoughts, and I heard nothing … nothing. You don’t have to do too many things for this holiday, and the few requirements were completely ignored.

Upon reciting to friends and peers in detail about how my family “does Thanksgiving,” they assumed that I was kidding, but this is no exaggeration. It’s sadly so very, very true.

At least Thanksgiving Day was celebrated at some point. My family did absolutely nothing for one of my favorite holidays, Columbus Day, and I didn’t even get an Evacuation Day card or a Veterans Day present. My house was absent of flags for Flag Day, and Forth of July is usually celebrated by my family on July 6 or 7, or whenever the closest weekend is. My family often ignores Washington during Presidents Day, and little time is focused on Lincoln as it is.

Bunker Hill Day is an all-time favorite of mine, a day commemorating the colonists’ heroic loss to the British on Breeds Hill (and to all you out-of-staters, Bunker Hill Day is a real holiday on June 17), but my family didn’t even mention it. They don’t even accept its existence.

I desire to properly celebrate the day when the Pilgrims thanked the Native Americans for their help, and in return introduced them to the wonders of the Old World, such as beads, horses, metal and smallpox.

Perhaps one day my wish will become a reality, but until then I can only live out Thanksgiving through television and dreams.

I’d like to thank Nate Kupel for giving me the courage to come out and tell the world about how my family “does” Thanksgiving.

Gilad Skolnick is a Collegian columnist.