Former “Saturday Night Live” cast member Tracy Morgan entertained a sold-out crowd of approximately 1,972 people this past Wednesday at the Fine Arts Center on the University of Massachusetts campus. Morgan’s flight was late, delaying the show by about an hour.

Despite jetlag, Morgan managed to entertain the audience – not to mention himself. His routine drew upon, among other things, the times he walked around his house naked, much to the chagrin of his wife and kids.

“I’ll walk around my house naked if I want to!” exclaimed Morgan. “I’m Muffasa! Rawr!”

“Sometimes I wish I was a baby again,” said Morgan, quickly changing the subject. “Just so I can have someone else wipe my ass. There is no better feeling in the world.”

Morgan continued with sexual antics throughout the show. He explained the difference between male and female masturbation. The graphic comedian made sure nothing was left to the imagination in his awkward rant.

“Men have to get all naked,” said Morgan. “They close the blinds, pop in the video, and then they stretch a bit.”

Morgan began demonstrating the process for the audience, who could not stop themselves from laughing at Morgan’s use of the microphone and facial expressions. Morgan did not stop with the NC-17 rated comedy as he began describing the female version of masturbation.

“Women make it a whole process,” said Morgan. “They have to go out shopping. They buy something from Victoria’s Secret. They go home and put on some Barry White, start a bubble bath and shave their legs.”

Once again Morgan brought the microphone into play and had the audience gasping for air in between their bursts of laughter. After giving the crowd a chance to catch their breath, Morgan decided to talk about the difference between women in pornography and women in the real world.

“You seen those girls in porno man?” said Morgan. “Those girls are like, ‘Oh, baby! Yeah! Give it to me! Awww!’ Real women just lay there.”

Morgan did not give the audience a chance to stop laughing from there as he continued showing the differences, in graphic detail, and had the audience laughing themselves to tears. He then decided to pick on a few ladies in the front section of the audience.

“Don’t worry I don’t bite,” said Morgan as he went to kiss a girl’s hand. “You got some big titties though!”

Morgan didn’t stop with the first girl. He decided to comment on another undergrad’s breasts and attempted to have a small conversation with a male undergrad.

“Hey! You a virgin?” Morgan asked to no response. “Answer the damn question motherf***er! I’m trying to get you laid. You guys get all embarrassed about sex, but you need to talk about it.”

Morgan’s stand-up continued with oral sex, using tissue paper and wanting to party with the students. He ended the show by talking about the time he caught his oldest son stealing his porno tape. What did he do to him? He sat him down and made him watch it with him.

” ‘You see that, son?’ ” Morgan said, acting out his conversation with his son. ” ‘That’s what we do. It’s called f***ing.’ Then the girl went down on the guy and he asked, ‘What is the girl doing to the guy?’ ‘Well son, that’s called a blowjob.’ At this point he was staring so I asked him if he liked it and he said, ‘Hell ye … I mean, yeah.’ Then I look back at the porno, but when I look back the kid is jerkin’ off. So I started smacking him while screaming, ‘What is wrong with you? Go help your mother cook dinner!’ “

Morgan thanked the audience for coming and promptly exited to a massive amount of cheers. Student Government President Dave Carr came out and thanked Tracy Morgan for coming and thanked Secretary of Public Policy and Relations Mina Safain for getting Morgan to the University. Two other local comedians opened for Tracy Morgan, but due to security at the show and time constraints, they were unable to be identified or reached for comment.