The Justin Bieber documentary will delight fans and irritate everyone else.

Little girls and cougars everywhere can rejoice, as the film they’ve been waiting for has finally arrived. “Justin Bieber: Never Say Never,” is a hybrid documentary/concert, detailing the teenage phenom’s improbable rise to fame from a small Canadian town. The film is spliced with footage of Bieber’s sold-out concert at Madison Square Garden.

Anyone who has turned on a radio in the last year has heard of Bieber, so it’s unlikely that anyone entering this film hasn’t already formed an opinion for or against him. As such, “Never Say Never” isn’t going to change minds in either direction. Fans looking to be entertained will be entertained, and those looking to jeer will be given plenty of material to work with.

The film tries to silence would-be detractors right out of the gate by opening with footage of an early Bieber performance. Surprisingly, Bieber has a remarkable level of vocal and instrumental talent, though the film’s attempt to pass him off as a musical prodigy is laughable. Still, the videos of his precocious ability, coupled with the humble recollections of his grandparents and single mother, create an endearing portrait of the superstar’s early days. The film makes it clear that Bieber is a hard worker and always has been, having performed on street corners in the hope of getting discovered. This type of Cinderella-story is one we’ve all seen before, but it’s uplifting enough to combat even the most cynical attitude. “Never Say Never” also wins points for its insight into modern celebrity. Social networking has become a mandatory avenue toward stardom, and Bieber, whose success was first propelled by YouTube, will likely stand as a relic of that trend.

Whatever merits the film earns in the back-story, however, are completely betrayed by the rest of the movie. It’s understandable that a documentary about a cultural phenomenon would contain a fair amount of hysterical fans, but “Never Say Never” takes it to an infuriating extreme. Showing a few clips of girls hot with Bieber Fever is comical; showing a few hundred is obnoxious. The level of adoration becomes frightening as the film shows moms and even adult men who are just as enraptured by Bieber as their children. Humorously, only one adult featured makes a disclaimer that her love for the pop star is not pedophiliac. Such psychotic devotion calls to mind similar occurrences in history, like the rise of the Manson family. Indeed, in one especially chilling moment, a stone-faced girl intones into the camera, “He and I will be husband and wife.” Her voice is so full of cultish passion that even Squeaky Fromme would be impressed.

Yet the devotion of these fans has its match in Bieber’s own obsession with himself. At times “Never Say Never” becomes such a parade of narcissism that one wonders whether Bieber, credited as a producer of the film, ever intended it to be comical at all. In the film’s most ridiculous sequence, Bieber stares seductively into the camera for nearly a full minute, whipping his hair from side to side while Etta James croons “At Last” in the background. Later, Bieber breaks the fourth wall in order to command the audience to stop texting and start paying attention to him. These moments might be humorous if they didn’t demonstrate a startling need for attention. What kind of egomaniac is this kid? Even the massive celebrities who nurtured Bieber, like Usher, seem bemused by his self-assuredness. Bieber certainly has musical talent and, much like a miniature horse, has a natural appeal because of his small size. But “Never Say Never” makes clear that his defining characteristic is his belief in himself. Like Napoleon, Justin Bieber has the confidence of a much taller and much more talented individual and he is using it to conquer the music world.

The film is available in 3-D, though I would advise against seeing it in that format, as it contributes nothing but discomfort. Only the concert portions are in 3-D and the effect is usually used to make you feel as if Bieber is locking eyes with you. Many will find Bieber’s music distressing enough, so having him stare you down will only augment that sensation.

In short, “Never Say Never” will give you exactly what you expect to get from it. Fans of Justin Bieber will have ample opportunity to adore him in the company of likeminded fellows, while haters will leave the theater incensed beyond all measure. The insight into stardom is moderately entertaining, as are the film’s numerous celebrity cameos, but if you’ve already formed an opinion of Justin Bieber, expect it to hold once the movie’s over.

Ian Opolski can be reached at [email protected].