Valentine’s Day is an explosion of red hearts, cupids and sugar. Cards and chocolates are swapped, flowers presented, and dining out is recommended. This physical representation of one’s love for another is what really makes this holiday great.

But some of us at the University of Massachusetts don’t get chocolates, flowers or cards handed to us by our loved one. We won’t get to spend time together dinning out or be seen holding hands. I probably won’t get a phone call, let alone a video chat from the man I love. That’s because my fiancé is fighting in Afghanistan and he doesn’t have easy access to a phone or Internet. The most I will get is a one line e-mail saying “Happy Valentine’s Day” and flowers and chocolates delivered by a stranger.

For military girlfriends / boyfriends, fiancés / fiancées, and spouses, Valentine’s Day is another holiday reminding us that our special someone is not here. We will look at couples walking hand in hand, hugging and kissing,and we will try to remember what that feels like. For my fiancé, it is just another day at war.

But what makes military relationships different from so many others is that we don’t ask for pity or sad looks when they are deployed. We are proud of the loving commitments we made to our soldiers, airmen and Marines.

I knew that falling for a man in the military was going to be the biggest challenge of my life, and it still is. However, there is not one day that goes by in which I regret being a part of this relationship because everyday it makes me a better person inside and out.

This year, tens of thousands of Americans in military relationships will be spending this holiday away from their families. For us at home, we will see it as a day to remember the sacrifice and love that our significant other has for this country.

So when you exchange chocolates and flowers today with the one you love, please cherish the time you two have. You are truly lucky to be together on this very special day.

For UMass and 5 College students who are in military relationships or have a loved one serving, the first meeting of the 5 College Family Readiness Group will be meeting on Wednesday Feb. 23 at 6 p.m. in Room 174 of the UMass Campus Center.

Caitlin Coughlan is the managing editor at Amherstwire.com. She can be reached at [email protected].