If you spent your Super Bowl Sunday this year hunched over in your dorm room, tears streaming down your face after our beloved New England Patriots lost, you will understand where I am coming from. You might scoff at this but listen to me: This game was honestly the end of the world for many young men like myself. I ran outside, yelling as I publicly cried with my fellow fans in the middle of Southwest Residential Area. I usually only cry over Fortnite, but this was a special exception.
Out of respect for the GOAT, a man that I love more than my entire family, Thomas Edward Patrick Brady Jr., we must put give this day the respect it deserves. February 4th should be a day of remembrance.
I’m talking no class, no homework and especially no talk of the Eagles or… *shudders* …Nick Foles. It hurts to even write his name. Not a mention of Philadelphia or the entire state of Pennsylvania for an entire day every year. It is just too much for the student body to bear. I’m usually not one to be a snowflake about certain words, but this is different. The Eagles pain me in the same way that Goodell pains me. I shudder every time someone mentions the academic building because I think they mean Roger Goodell.
This stuff is heavy. It hurts every time I think about it. We need to all recognize the pain that this day caused not only our school, but all of New England.
We get a day off for Patriots Day every year, but we don’t get a day off for the New England Patriots, and that’s just not right. I couldn’t even get out of bed for a whole week after the loss this year; imagine what it’s going to be like next year on the one-year anniversary. Classes are going to be empty, there will be no snow dages (#DartySzn) and there won’t be anyone in the dining halls. It just makes sense that the University of Massachusetts should cancel classes on February 4th to allow students to sulk appropriately.
This Super Bowl has torn my entire team apart. They are like my sons and they are like sons to all of Massachusetts—and New England too, I guess. We must remember what it was like when we lost Danny Amendola, and we might even lose Rob Gronkowski too.
At the absolute minimum, we should at least get a plaque to remember what happened on that fateful night. Maybe we could put it right outside Berkshire Dining Commons, right where I threw my Tom Brady pillow. Of course, I had to go grab it because we all know that it should not touch the ground in any circumstances, it’s basically a religious symbol to me and my brothers in Southwest. Anyway, back to the plaque. I’m thinking it has to be somewhere we can all see it when we go to Berk Late Night when we’re drunk. It could read something like this: “On February 4, 2018, Thomas Edward Patrick Brady Jr. set a record for most passing years in any postseason game, but it was not enough because the National Football League is out to get us and for some reason wanted Philadelphia to win.” Malcom Butler would’ve helped us win, so maybe give him a shout out.
Anyway, I ask that the Chancellor and the University consider giving students the day off every February 4th because it is wicked important to the history of this school and our team. Remember, if you don’t learn about history, it is doomed to repeat itself. And we definitely do not want this to happen again. I don’t know how much longer I can go hiding my “Blitz For Six” tattoo.
Thad Brown can be followed on Twitter @firegoodell2k18 and found at Berk Late Night, singing Sweet Caroline while chugging PowerAde in his favorite Patriots onesie.