Massachusetts Daily Collegian

A free and responsible press serving the UMass community since 1890

A free and responsible press serving the UMass community since 1890

Massachusetts Daily Collegian

A free and responsible press serving the UMass community since 1890

Massachusetts Daily Collegian

Toxic masculinity is an American crisis

Let men be emotional
%28Judith+Gibson-Okunieff%29
(Judith Gibson-Okunieff)

“Last September, the American Psychological Association determined that there was a connection between ‘negative male socialization and violence.’”

With this quote, fellow Massachusetts Daily Collegian opinion columnist Greg Fournier opens his Jan. 30 article “We need more masculinity in our lives,” which details the perceived problems with a lack of masculinity in American families. Fournier goes on to describe the detriments and disadvantages of single-parent households, as well as insinuate that a former Navy SEAL knows more about masculine psychology than the American Psychological Association. It should be said Fournier is certainly entitled to his opinion, and I am glad he provides a different viewpoint than the one usually presented in the Collegian. However, I am entitled to my opinion as well – and my opinion is that masculinity is a dangerous social construct.

Before you accuse me of hating men, you should understand my issue is not with traditional masculinity as a whole. In fact, I believe traits traditionally associated with masculinity are beneficial in a well-developed individual – for instance; assertiveness, stoicism, courage and strength are all valuable and “traditionally masculine” characteristics. What I take issue with are the implications that in order for a child to be successful, there must be a traditionally masculine influence in their life. Can’t a child who has grown up in a single-parent household learn these traits? Can’t a mother teach her son or daughter to be strong, brave, assertive or stoic?

It is true that most single-parent households are run by mothers. According to the 2016 United States census, of the 11 million families with children under age 18, and no spouse present, 8.5 million are single mothers. It is also true that this may have an effect on the development of children growing up in those homes. However, the argument at hand is that a lack of a specifically masculine presence in a household has dangerous consequences, including, evidently, a correlation with neighborhood crime rates. The study used as a source for this information mentions nothing about the lack of a masculine influence in connection to an increase in violent crime and burglary – it simply connects single parent families to neighborhoods which are more prone to crime.

However, there is a connection between masculinity and dangerous behavior in the psyches of men across the United States. Men are taught to suppress their emotions and be entirely self-reliant, which can potentially lead to increased depression, stress and substance abuse. Men are also less likely than women to seek mental health treatment for depression, substance abuse and general life events – a full two-thirds of mental health outpatient visits were made by women– despite experiencing these problems just as frequently as women.

The effects of masculinity can also be deadly. In 2010, Bushmaster Firearms ran an ad campaign featuring an AR-15 and the words, “Consider Your Man Card Reissued.” Firearms and weapons are associated with masculinity, and this can have devastating effects. According to the FBI, 66 percent of all known homicide offenders were men. In the case of mass shootings with four or more victims, nearly all of the perpetrators were men. Guns are marketed toward men and are made out to be one of the ultimate tools of masculinity. What results is dangerous weapons in the hands of people who think they know how to use them.

There is a crisis involving masculinity in the United States, but it is not the one Fournier describes in his article. Men in the United States face a crisis of identity within themselves – suffering silently with their problems and feeling like it’s not “manly” to seek professional counseling. Rather than teaching men to suppress their feelings, we should teach our men that it is okay to reach out for help when they need it, in regard to mental health and in life in general. We should teach our men empathy and compassion rather than forcing them to develop a tough-guy attitude. It is okay to have traditionally “feminine” traits, in fact, it makes for a more mature and emotionally well-rounded person. Instead of placing the blame for whatever the gripe may be on single parents or on “lack of a masculine influence,” we should take charge and raise a new generation to break the constructs they have been raised to believe in. Let women be assertive, and let men be emotional, for their own sakes.

 

Ana Pietrewicz is a Collegian columnist and can be reached at [email protected].

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  • A

    Antonio Perales del HierroOct 4, 2021 at 12:22 pm

    First of all there is no “War against males.” but against crude overbearing and violent machísta dolts, a War which has existed since man began to reason. Patriarchy acts as an empowering Affirmative Action program for straight-acting males , defining, protecting and privileging males, whether sane or psycho, bright or dull-witted, humane or authoritarian, there being No Quality Control over who gets the empowerment, who gets the message that straight-acting males CAN rally Do as they damn please. With so many social and cultural ” green lights” which empower certain social qualities which even psychos can embrace, Patriarchy Will excrete monsters Like Stalin, Hitler, Trujillo, Somoza, Duterte and Mengele and prove dramatically that hyper-masculinists, with little more in mind than sheer domination will never convince, and so must often abuse or kill.

    Reply
  • T

    TariqJun 28, 2020 at 6:22 am

    American men have the worse case of toxic masculinty on the planet, but can’t see it because they’re not willing to make changes.

    Reply
  • A

    AndrewApr 27, 2020 at 9:48 pm

    This article is right. We need less emotional suppression, less anger, more compassion and empathy. If that means masculinity has to go, it has to go. Toxic masculinity is not hate speech. Toxic masculinity is real and deadly. It is behind the countless deadly shootings that the US has been enduring. Toxic masculinity is embodied in the Republican Party and our Republican-heavy governments are strangling the US.

    Reply
  • T

    Tyler DurdenFeb 26, 2019 at 9:43 pm

    First off, thank you for writing this, while I disagree with many of your points I think this dialogue is vital in a society that is moving well beyond the realms of fitting classic archetypal masculinity. I agree, men should be able to show emotion, but only when appropriate. Men are inherently going to display signs of emotion in a completely different fashion compared to women, which can be difficult for those subscribed to third wave feminist ideology to wrap their heads around. Men and Women are not equal, I’m not saying one is better than the other, but that the differences of the two genders is what make humanity beautiful. In stereotypical fashion due to hormonal makeup, women TEND to be more empathetic/caring while men TEND to be more aggressive /driven. This aggressiveness/drive could then be fit into the category of masculine traits.

    This brings me to my point here, men are no longer being taught how to be men. We’ve prescribed to a culture of greed, gratification, and self-centered gluttony. A boy without a father is going to have a difficult time learning where to vent his frustration in today’s age where men are no longer storming the beaches of Normandy. In a single mother household; a mother’s social conditioning on a boy will make him resort to his social interactions from a feminine viewpoint, which is extremely destructive long term. Look at the rise of incels for example… Boys who weren’t taught how to be men and now they have prescribed to the most toxic, sexist, and radical ideologies the depths of the internet have to offer while they live in their mother’s basement. They are slaves to their bad upbringing and lack of fatherly love /discipline. They don’t know how to present themselves through a masculine image. They struggle as they know no other way and few are trying to help them.

    Toxic masculinity does not exist, that is too easy of a way to vilify struggling men. The term is a blanket for debate in my opinion. Masculinity exists. It’s how that masculinity is expressed which makes all the difference. Like many issues this isn’t one way or the other. Men must be looked at the individual level to determine their traits, for some they have found out how to express their masculinity while others struggle to… Collectivism in this debate will not add anything, look at the bottom up, not the top down if we are to figure out what to do with masculine traits in an advanced society that does not provide the constant threat of a lion trying to eat you. “I know my sheep, and my sheep know me” John 10:14

    Reply
    • G

      GanzaloMay 13, 2022 at 9:24 am

      I totally agree with your sheep my sheep love me too, thank you for telling us you dont have a father

      Reply
  • R

    rabelFeb 26, 2019 at 7:21 pm

    “Toxic masculinity” is hate speech.
    Talk about the actual behaviors if you are genuinely interested in a dialogue, rather than just attaching an extreme negative adjective to a gender.
    I not sure why you think it’s OK to discuss masculinity using language you know is offensive to many men? Do you use this approach when talking about women or LGBTI? Or is it an approach you save for people you hate?

    Reply
  • S

    Stephanie HigginsFeb 26, 2019 at 1:27 pm

    Thanks for this response!

    Reply
  • A

    amyFeb 26, 2019 at 7:50 am

    Toxic masculinity doesn’t exist lol, it’s made-up. Silly liberals… And what is with their strange and bizarre obsession with gender? It’s abnormal, most people, male or female don’t care about this, think about it, or make up ‘gender pronouns’ or theories like toxic masculinity. I feel that there is something wrong with liberals as human beings and how they developed, that always make them think and propose bizarre ways of how you should be as a human being or bizarre theories.

    Reply